My Calling
- Sara Erb
- Mar 5, 2017
- 3 min read
It became very clear to me that God called me to vocational ministry when I was a junior in High School. It was during a worship set at a summer camp, during the song “Good Good Father” and just like that, one second I was there worshipping with 200 of my peers, and then the next second I was somewhere else. Everything was dark and all I could hear was a loud buzzing noise. I could not see anything, but somehow I knew I was in the presence of my King. Suddenly there was a bright flash, and the room was now filled with a bright white display of a world map. It was so bright in contrast to the dark room I remember using my arm to block my face and turning away quickly because it burned my eyes. After a second I became to acclimate to it, and I turned back to face the bright light through squinted eyes. Every country and tribe was presented before me and vaguely above the sound of the buzz I heard His sure and steady voice say “I am equipping you to be sent. This is for you.” I then began to watch my feet appear in every country all at once. Ot was like God had placed me right into a reenactment of Isaiah 6:8, only I had not asked to be sent, or even offered - in fact I was reluctant.
Over the next few months I very begrudgingly began to tell my friends and family that I was going to go into ministry. My parents encouraged me to continue to go to school and pursue a degree that would land me a job that actually paid well; I could still do ministry after school, but to at least pursue a good job to fall back on. I told them I could not, I had to obey God, and trust that his plan was good enough and I did not need to prepare a back up life for myself. However, I, myself still did not feel super comfortable with the idea of going into ministry. My dad was a pastor when I was growing up, and it was never something I saw for myself. I had nothing against it, I just did not see it for myself, and kind of hid behind my dads faith without ever taking ownership of it myself. I told people God called me into ministry, but I was still secretly hoping to find a loop hole out of it. It was not until over two years later that I fully accepted my calling. Within a few weeks at Biola University studying ministry, I quickly began to let go of my fear that I would not like ministry, and my anxiety about pursuing ministry vocationally, because I realized this was exactly where I was meant to be.
That summer I spent 8 weeks in Uganda. I went by myself - it was my first time using my passport, and my first time really stepping out of my comfort zone. That summer is when I realized what it was I was put on this earth to do. Firstly, to love those who do not even realize how loved they are. To share the joy I have found in Him. To share the love of God with everyone I meet so that they too can wake up feeling this insane love and value that I wake up feeling every morning. To help find the lost and show they they have a home. To not rest until every person know how insanely loved they are by the one who made them. I can not imagine where I would be if I had not found this insane love, and I want everyone else around me to feel that love too. Secondly, I want to show people that He will equip ANYONE who is willing. When God called me to go overseas, my first reaction was “I am way too girly for that, Jesus, sorry, go find some backpacker and call them overseas instead.” But when I spent that summer in Uganda I realized God was able to equip me, it was not up to my own abilities. And just like that, I want everyone to know if they are bold enough to let God take them out of their comfort zone, He can equip anyone to go overseas and share the good news.
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